Crew Assembled – Episode 2 of a Tallgrass Sojourn

It gives me great pleasure and satisfaction to introduce to you our recently assembled crack team of misfits. Each has a role to play, a talent to milk, and a fatal flaw that just might turn out to be their greatest strength. But will they band together in time to accomplish what nobody thought they could? Let’s meet them, man by man.


Justin Danforth, as Daniel


Justin, or “Jonesy” to his enemies, is our greaseman. Trained in several useless martial arts, his dexterity will make short work of most security obstacles our team might come across. He is known to have a hot temper, in part due to a brain injury suffered during a brief stint as a stuntman in Korea. The quarter-sized hole in his skull is the only souvenir he took away, though in the slums of Seoul there are rumors of a former stuntman with a necklace of ears, purloined off the heads of some of the most prominent film directors of southeast Asia.

Paige Goodloe, as MaryImage

To prepare for Paige Goodloe’s inclusion on the team, the rest of the force has undergone several months of psy-training. The team has been equipped with strategies to prevent accidental brain-death as a result of coming into contact with a level-five mentalist. At the end of training, however, we were all reminded that our efforts would be akin to using a sheet of looseleaf to block a bullet should Goodloe intentionally initiate a brainlock. Her time at the Academy is legendary and needs no reference, except that the Wikipedia page of the institution contains several subsections dedicated to her performance in the 1989 PsyGames and over 4500 words of argument in the Discussion section over her widely recognized fingergun technique. The less said about her personal life the better.

Mike Wesolowski, as Tin


We found Mike in the last place anyone expected – a run down motel in the middle of western Nevada, passed out in a pool of his own vomit and piss, his trademark shutter shades twisted to the breaking point and stained with the blood of enemies, friends, and ostensibly whoever he could get his hands on. After wresting an AK-47 out of his grip and popping his left shoulder back into place, we cleaned him up and brought him back to HQ. Even bruised, battered, and covered with tattoos of Mickey Mouse in lewd positions, in testing and diagnostics he cracked a safe in under 2.5 minutes and managed an impressive seven-minute mile on the treadmill. Cleaned up, he’s a force to be reckoned with, but I wouldn’t want to be the man in his way if Mike loses control and breaks bad.

Sean Brannon, as Scotto


Sean is our demolitions expert. He works under cover of night exclusively, and contacts us only by radio. This is the only photo of him that anyone has ever taken and I have not once had a face-to-face conversation with him. I am told by associates that he has a thick unibrow and seven gold teeth. His accent appears to be a cockney-jamaican hybrid, and he leaves a chocolate any time he visits the control center. Sean has sired four bastard children, all of whom work in the latex industry.

Karsten Otto, as Filene


Karsten “Kard-Shark” Otto was born Raj Salvatore, the youngest of six heirs to the Salvatore publishing fortune. In 1993, he and his youngest older brother staged an attempted coup resulting in the public Sliming of the entire Board of Trustees, including his father and his oldest brother. The brother took the fall and was summarily executed; Raj, fearing for his safety and that of his working-class girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks, eloped with the girlfriend to the isle of Fiji and adopted a new name, rebuilding a life in the process through pickpocketing and petty thievery, under the guise of competitive poker-playing. Know him by the twinkle in his eye, and the astonishing fact of his hands on which all ten fingers are thumbs.

Gigi Hernandez, as Laura


The woman who reinvented the tomahawk. Top Gun pilot in the Canada Skirmishes. Regina Hernandez is the brains behind the operation, calling the shots as she sees fit. Regina contacted me for one last job some five summers ago, and I hope to hell that job just keeps on going. You only get the chance to work with the best in my field of work once. After that, it’s the gallows, the guillotine, or the graveyard. Hernandez is the exception that proves the rule. She has more fake passports than there are globally recognized countries. We were married, twice, and divorced as many times: the chemical burns just got to be too much for me. She has a soft spot for cowboys, but after all, who doesn’t.

see more of the cast soon at

your director,



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